Author Interview: The Family That Finds Us by Phoenix Blackwood

R
Hello cinnabar moths or any kind of moth you’d like to be, welcome to the Writers Triangle, Cinnabar Moth’s podcast for all things publishing and books. Today we’re here with Phoenix Blackwood, author of The Family That Finds Us. The Family That Finds Us is our April release. Phoenix, how’re you doing today?

P
I’m doing well. How are you?

R
I’m doing pretty well. Thanks for asking. So I want to get right into Are you feeling excited about the upcoming release of The Family That Finds Us?

P
I am, I think family is a good closing addition to The Surviving Youth Trilogy, it it wraps everything up nicely. And it really shows the spirit of each character at their best.

R
And so going into this, you know, this is wrapping up the series and everything. What are you most looking forward to it? With the release of the permanent plans us? Are you going to do anything special.

P
I’m looking forward to having the complete series together all three of these characters stories building upon each other. I’m hoping to do a book signing at my local Barnes and Noble around the release date. And otherwise, I’ll be framing age paperback with its Library of Congress letters, and they’ll make a display on my shelf.

R
That sounds really nice. So you can have that reminder and kind of immortalize it for yourself. Right. Yeah. And so with The Family That Finds Us being the third and final book in The Surviving Youth Trilogy, how does it feel to have the series be finished have this story can it be wrapped up?

P
It’s bittersweet for sure. I’ve had these characters in some form since I was very young. And letting go of them has been a really difficult process. And I’m really grateful to have had these characters in my life. They were like having friends with me every step of the way through my young adulthood. And that’s something I really needed and wasn’t getting in the real world.

R
So now you’ve been able to flesh out their journeys and have them grows well with you and actually put that down for the people to also experience and share.

P
Yeah.

R
And so you mentioned that they’ve been with you for a while, but when you first started writing the first book, The Secrets That Kill Us, did you plan for the story to develop the way that it has or has it sort of changed and evolved as you’ve been writing?

P
My character, my characters kind of drive the car and I’m just the passenger. Well, the first book was pretty planned out, they kind of took the wheel from there a lot of things happened in both love and family that were unexpected. But especially in family I went in without even the slightest of an outline, and just kind of let it go wherever it wanted. There’s even some twists in it that I didn’t even realize were going to happen.

R
So the first book you had a solid plan for and then the rest from there you you felt comfortable enough to I guess – not even necessarily comfortable enough it just sort of happened where the stories developed themselves. And that comes from your relationship with the characters. Can you can you talk a little bit about your relationship with them? You said they’ve been with you for a long time.

P
Theo’s definitely my closest relationship they’re the golden child and the best friend their book is a delve into what it’s like to be in my head all the time and their journey mirrors mine quite a bit. Alex is the one I have the hardest time relating to I feel like that disconnect kind of came through in her book a little bit. She’s a wonderful soul and I do understand a lot of her struggles but her brain just isn’t wired like mine. She’s the mom friend through and through. Phee holds very special place. She’s the most like me and so many aspects. Her anxiety is her people pleasing her relationship with her mother. It’s it’s all things that I relate to. She’s got a little bit of fire in her but she’s afraid to let it show sometimes. And her brain isn’t the nicest to her and she needs support from her friends to figure out her life. I relate relate really deeply to her and some some parts of her story were uncanny.

R
See, and so with that the final book, you know, the family finds us. It revolves primarily around fie and her journey of self discovery, overcoming hardships involved with that, as well as difficulties with her environment, even with as you mentioned, just not having a friendly brain. What inspired this story for you the most?

P
A lot of Phee’s story comes from my own there’s a denial of who she is until the final realization and a resistance to accepting her own identity. She deals with bullying at school before she’s even out as queer. And it’s like everyone knows before she does. She struggles in her relationship with her mother due to her mother’s vices, and she wants so badly to please everyone around her that she never comes first, not to herself or anyone else. It’s lonely. It’s heartbreaking. And I lived that, um, she fights with her own brain for permission to live and be herself. And it’s something she needs the help of help of someone who’s been there and done that do is her great saving grace, just like they were mine.

R
So yes, there’s quite a few parallels for you in terms of the experiences that you’ve had through your life and Phee’s journey in particular of the three characters in the book. Yeah. And with exploring the sense of anxiety around self discovery, and the struggle for acceptance, the interpersonal connections on the split out the stories, I feel that they’ve all been written phenomenally, including Alex’s story, which he said he felt a bit of a disconnect from, I still felt that story was very, very strong. Do you find it challenging to capture these intense personal emotions when writing their stories?

P
Some scenes were more difficult than others. Theo’s book was by far the most difficult to write. I wrote it in a time when I was having a lot of the same feelings they had. So some of the scenes really hit me hard. Like I, like I mentioned with the disconnect that we had with Alex’s books, some of the scenes don’t feel as genuine to me, I’d probably change some of them if I could. But Phee’s book, I feel like it’s on a similar wavelength as Theo’s. I believe I was in a much better mental state when I was writing it, then Theo’s and the emotions fi deals with are really familiar to me, but not so overwhelming anymore.

R
So you mentioned that, you know, you’ve been in different places throughout your life and emotionally when writing these stories. Now that you’re on the other side of writing them, looking back on them. Would you say that you would have written perhaps Theo’s story differently now that you’re in a different state? Or are you satisfied with the story?

P
I feel like the way that Theo’s stories written is really powerful. And even though it was a time when like, my brain wasn’t the best, I feel like it’s a really important thing that showed up people whose brains don’t necessarily work like that.

R
So going back to you feel like that story is something that even now you you feel is written exactly how you wanted it? Yeah, I think that’s great. And it’s always good to hear the, from authors when they write about their books that they feel satisfied on the other side of it. And I do agree that the messaging and Theo’s story is important. And overall, the story across all of the books have survived The Surviving Youth Trilogy, to me has been about taking the time and space to find your truth, and honest view of the struggles of being outside the binary and the beauty that is found family and how that support can really uplift you and bring you through what might otherwise be someone else turbulent times of your life. And even without support can still be was this message that you intended for the stories?

P
I intended a lot of messages with these stories, and those are definitely some of them. My biggest goal was to send the message to queer and neurodivergent people, that they’re not alone, that we’re a community and we look out for each other, that we’re worth loving. And that who we are as beautiful, even if it’s messy and chaotic.

R
I think that’s a really beautiful message. And I definitely agree that there, there is a very strong sense of community that can be found if you look for it and are open to connecting with it. And I think some people feel afraid at first to seek out community because they don’t know if there’ll be accepted even amongst people who are similar to them, right.

P
Yeah, for sure. Um, in my in my day job, I do a lot of work in the community. especially the queer community, and I’ve seen how big of a difference it can make for people who get into the community that before they really do that they, their mental state is so much worse than it is when they find that community and they realize that they’re not the only person in the world that feels the way that they do.

R
Yeah, I definitely agree that it’s important for people to find like people so that they can feel less isolated in their experiences, and be able to have people to talk through who have been through those things and be like, it’s okay, it gets better. Or here, maybe some advice for getting through it, or even just someone to listen, that you know, is going to understand that at least some of what you’re going through is a huge shift and how the experience lands on you. And so, going back to the books a bit with the journey from the secrets to kill us to now with The Family That Finds Us it’s been about two years since the first book publication. Did you feel drawn to write other stories writing the series? Or did this series have all of your attention while you’re writing it?

P
I wrote a lot of short stories in that time, I take commissions pretty regularly and have done little snapshots of people’s characters and plots. I’ve also written a few short stories for competitions and literary magazines. One I’m particularly proud of is titled glimmer, and it will be in cinnabar moth literary collection soon. I’ve dabbled a little with a few concepts for other novels, one of which I shelved because I feel like it’s a story that’s not right for me to tell on my own. If I get people with the identities I want showcased involved, I’d love to see it come through come to fruition. But the other that I’ve been working on is one that I’m actively invested in and hoping to publish next year.

R
That’s really exciting to hear. And I’m sure the fans of your work will love to know that there’s plenty of it out there to continue exploring and that there’s more to come. And so with the saving youth trilogy, there’s a lot of hard and emotional topics and scenes throughout the three books. But each one kept with a hopeful message when it came to, you know, the messaging of being able to survive it to make it through and to find community and everything. Did you find it difficult to balance the two of the hopeful message along with tackling and were and having a very honest, although difficult view of these struggles.

P
I really wanted to show that things can be hard, but help is out there when and then there’s people who will take care of us when we need it. Those of us that can’t find love at home can find it in a family that we make on our own with people who aren’t blood, but are every bit as important. And the queer joy that comes from hardship and learning to love ourselves. Despite how the world treats us. That balance is pretty particular. It’s it’s it goes back and forth quite a bit, but I feel like it’s definitely one that can be found within the books and shows a lot of the resilience that the characters have.

R
Yeah, definitely agree in the zone who read it, I did feel that that balance being struck really well for me as a reader at least, and following the journey of these characters. And there are times when I was brought to tears by the emotions that were pulled through. But there are also times that I felt my heart warmed by the positivity of the support and the connection they found with each other and also the connections they found with themselves and learning to embrace their identity. And so, from the start of the strength children to now, it quite a bit of time has passed. Do you feel like your written voice has changed since you started the series or is it been mostly the same?

P
I feel like my written voice changes with every piece that I write. It adapts to the characters, the situations and the stories. It grows with Is each new book that I read and love picking up the voices that other authors use. I do believe I’ve improved quite a bit since my first manuscript and I hope to continue improving with any future books that I write.

R
I think that’s a very wonderful view of writing in that you’re constantly seeking to grow and, and take in more ways to express and that’s kind of the beauty of the art, right is the, the variety of expression that’s available to us that we can explore and, and play with and find the one that fits with the narrative we’re trying to convey.

P
For sure, there’s, um, there’s this book called I don’t remember the the author of it, but it’s called Steal Like an Artist. And it talks a lot about how pretty much any art that’s worth putting effort into doesn’t just come from like a vacuum, it’s not isolated. It’s a response to things that happen around us to things that other people have done and the the works of like people who inspire us.

R
Yeah, I definitely agree with that message. And I’ll ask you do you have a particular artist or writer recently that has been inspiring some of your work?

P
Um, I’m really particular to Adam Silver’s writing, honestly, he’s my favorite author. I actually just today got a couple tattoos of symbolism from a couple of his books. And I really like the voice that he writes with the way that you really feel for the characters and how you get a view of like, what goes on in their head and the different struggles that they have.

R
That’s awesome to hear. Sounds like you’re a really big fan. You used to got arm tattoo today? You said, Yeah,

P
I just got one for More Happy Than Not, which is my favorite book that he wrote, it was actually his debut. And I, I got one touched up that I’ve gotten a couple of weeks ago that was for, um, they both die at the end, which is his most popular one.

R
I think that’s really awesome that you have another writer that you connect so well with that helps to inspire homework. And hopefully, as readers connect with your work, you might have people who like you connect with what you’ve written in a way that inspires them to wants to bring that into their life in some way.

P
Yeah, I think that would be really cool.

R
Going back to The Surviving Youth Trilogy, I asked you, you’ve said that you’ve connected with the characters, but do you have a favorite?

P
If it’s not obvious by now Theo’s definitely my favorite. The way that their brain works the fire inside them that keeps them fighting the the limitless love that they feel to those who deserve it. They’re really rough around the edges, but that’s okay. I’m through difficult times, they learn to love themselves as much as they love others. And they taught me to fight for what’s important and to fight for myself, even though I might not want to. They’ll always stand up for the people who need it.

R
I definitely felt that in Theo’s story and watching them as they continued to exert their presence and the following stories throughout the book series. And I think that Theo is a beautiful character that you’ve written wonderfully. And now, with you having experienced writing a trilogy, and going through that process of three books that are connected in the stories involved with that, do you have any advice or perhaps some thoughts that you’d share with authors who might be planning to do a similar thing of writing a story that spans multiple novels?

P
I definitely wouldn’t advise following in my footsteps. I went full pantser no outline, just scenes cobbled together sitting down to write having no idea where things would go. I think maybe it’s a good idea to have more structure than that. Um, absolutely. Write what you’re passionate about and slip in things as they come to you but maybe have some kind of a road that you’re walking instead of getting lost in the woods. Or not, maybe maybe it’s all about getting lost in the woods and eventually you always come out on the other side.

R
Thank that’s uh, interesting view of it, I hadn’t thought of it in terms of thinking about being lost in the woods. But it makes sense like, because you can still find so many different things and that might inspire you or, or create a new vision by just wandering around sometimes, right? For sure. And so now that you’ve finished serves The Surviving Youth Trilogy, you mentioned that you are writing short stories that you have other novels in mind. Could you share a little bit more about that? What have you got plans? What’s next for Phoenix Blackwood.

P
I’m currently working on a new adult novel titled cast to ashes. It’s quite a bit different from The Surviving Youth Trilogy, but it has some messages that are just as important. It follows a queer couple through messy and intense beginnings and gradually become something more sinister than expected. I won’t spoil anything, but everything is not as not as it seems on face value. There’s some darkness there if you really look. And it’s a journey through a relationship that echoes my own first relationship, and it shows what someone can become under dire circumstances.

R
It sounds like a rather exciting book it it’s a tad different in terms of the viewpoints, but I think that it still has, from what I know of you will likely have messaging in it, that is still as easy to connect with, as, in some ways, or, as The Surviving Youth Trilogy was.

P
Yeah, I’m the main there’s two main characters, but one of the main characters is also neurodivergent. And that plays a really big role in part of the books.

R
And so I want to ask you a little bit when it comes to your writing, do you plan to focus primarily with neurodivergent and non binary spaces in your writing? Or is that just something that happens naturally and organically for you? Do you actively seek to do it?

P
Um, I think I’m always gonna write queer stories, at the very least, but I do tend to throw in a lot of neuro divergence, and that’s, that comes pretty naturally to me, just because I am not neurotypical by any, any stretch of the imagination. So that’s, I think that’s part of what made it really difficult for me to write Alex because she’s the closest thing I have to a neurotypical character. And I feel like that’s what I struggled with the most and writing her. Um, but I really enjoy writing neurodivergent characters and showing the different viewpoints that neurotypicals might not necessarily think of.

R
I think that’s very valuable and important. And even for me who I am on, I am neurotypical, I have some experience, I have some people in my life, quite a few people, my including my own father, who are neurodivergent. And getting a view into that and connecting with the through your writing has also helped me to have greater and better conversations with some of the neurodivergent people in my life, just by having gotten a little bit more of a peek into some of the ways that people might approach or think about situations that I wouldn’t necessarily imagine. Right.

P
Yeah, I think it’s I think it’s a really important thing to show to people that their way of thinking might not necessarily be the same way that another person is viewing the situation.

R
And I think that’s a wonderful plan one message to kind of connect with people on and Phoenix I want to thank you today for talking with us and for being on the Writer’s Triangle. It’s been a pleasure having you.

P
Yeah, of course.

R
And for all our beautiful moths. Thank you for listening. Be sure to by The Family That Finds Us coming out this upcoming Tuesday. Phoenix, can you tell everybody where we can find you social media websites.

P
I have a website which is Phoenix blackwood.com. And I am @NixBlackwood on both Twitter and Instagram.

R
Wonderful. And for everybody listening, be sure to visit cinnabar moth.com where you can check up the transcripts and we will also have the links to all of Phoenix’s social media. Once again, Phoenix it’s been wonderful talking with you today. And thank you for being on.

P
It was great talking with you too

R
And for everybody listening bye bye